Thrive Research

A 13th Birthday Wish

My niece turned 13 this weekend.

Since her much heralded birth (our family’s first) she’s deepened our collective love for the color pink and introduced everyone to the zen of Hello Kitty. Personally, she’s been my go-to gal for everything girly from high tea and make-believe spas to show tune sing-alongs.

Although we live exactly 2781 miles apart, I’ve noticed some big changes this year. Like most adolescents, she’s becoming more self-conscious about what others think, especially at school.

Although she taught herself enough spoken Japanese (on the internet) to voice over her original anime videos on YouTube, this creativity doesn’t always translate into academic success. Especially when it comes to spelling and math. In typical take-charge fashion, she even tried to remedy the situation by getting a pair of fake glasses to “make herself look and feel smarter”.

Like concerned parents and doting aunties everywhere, I can’t shield her from life’s realities. What I can do is offer her skills and support in recognizing and building on her unique strengths, like an innate capacity for self-reflection.

She took this photo immediately after we saw Legally Blonde on Broadway for her 11^th birthday, saying she “always wanted to remember how happy she felt”. I hope that she’ll use this photo, along with the skills learned in PeakPerformance every time she feels less than what she truly is…amazing.

Can’t think of a better birthday wish.

"No One Likes To Be Pulled Out Of Class By The School Nurse..."

...or the school counselor. 

We've heard this frequently from both kids and parents who say that being singled out is a stressful and humiliating experience. 

Thrive Research's solutions offer families a way to deal with issues privately and effectively, online anytime.

Check out this video to learn more about Thrive's approach to online delivery.

Pining For Home Sweet Home

Most students experience some level of homesickness – even if they're not far from home.

A recent paper in Pediatrics (Thurber and Walton), the journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, defined homesickness as "distress and functional impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separation from home and attachment objects such as parents."   

CNN  reported on the “malady” last week, quoting stars like Twilight's Robert Pattinson as saying he “misses home badly”.

A recent paper in Pediatrics (Thurber and Walton), the journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, defined homesickness as "distress and functional impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separation from home and attachment objects such as parents".

Other researchers say that homesickness is not actually about home or sickness, but an emotion that comes in waves. 

Fortunately, it's usually only temporary and students with skills in identifying and managing their emotions are the best equipped to cope.  

Take Hayley, for instance. A good student with a pretty active social life, Hayley was initially excited about her new adventure at a highly respected university 200 miles away from home. So she was more than a little surprised when – just a few weeks into her first semester – she found herself obsessing with thoughts of family, friends, and familiar surroundings back in her hometown.  

"College life was so different than what I was used to," says Hayley. "I was making new friends, but something just didn't feel right."  

At first, Hayley thought simply plunging into her studies would help. With the mountains of schoolwork thrust upon new college students, it's easy to lose oneself in one's studies.  

"I tried spending more time in the library," Hayley says, "and trying to hang out with my roommate and other new friends more often, but I kept making excuses to go home on the weekends."  

While her parents were initially happy to see Hayley more often than they expected, they were also concerned that she didn't seem to be embracing life away from the nest.  

"As much as we loved Hayley's visits," says her mom, Barbara, "we sensed she just wasn't happy being away at school."  

Fortunately, Haley learned some valuable skills and found some great ideas for dealing with homesickness in Thrive's CollegeSuccess program: interactive, online sessions focused on communication, meeting people, relationships, assertiveness, conflict resolution, and other topics that may be unfamiliar to incoming college students help young adults cope with homesickness.

"It helped me to see that I wasn't the only one going through these things," says Hayley. "I was relieved to get some practical tips on stuff that seemed like a big deal."  

Rather than spending so much time shuttling between school and home, Hayley now plans a weekly phone call with her folks while she's gotten more involved with dorm life. As Hayley entered her second semester, homesickness subsided and the real fun of college began.  

"It's always great to go home," says Hayley. "But now I'm enjoying my new home a lot more."

photo courtesy of CNN

High Drama @ Home: What's A Parent To Do?

Another fantastic NPR piece on moody teens!

Taryn Cregon and her 13-year-old daughter Zoe have a typical relationship that alternates between high drama and loads of love. Taryn is confused and mystified by the sudden shifts and is frequently hurt by Zoe’s sudden outbursts.

Pediatrician James Chattra explains that biology is largely responsible--critical changes occur in the prefrontal cortex (the “thinking” part of the brain) during the teen years. About half of the "thinking" neurons in certain regions of the brain, Chattra says, are literally "wiped out."

If parents are no match for biology, can anything be done? Yes, says author Laura Kastner, who along with Jennifer Wyatt wrote a recent book, Getting To Calm: Cool Headed Strategies For Parents Of Teens & Tweens.

She encourages parents to take actions that specifically engage the “thinking” part of brain. Activities like journaling or self-reflection letters can de-escalate situations while moving teens past episodes of emotional frenzy.

At Thrive Research, we agree. In fact, we’ve developed an online solution that incorporates these types of exercises while building core skills such as mindfulness, self-reflection, and emotional regulation.

Get started here and give your favorite teen every advantage in developing a healthy brain and emotional life.

photo courtesy of Taryn Cregon 

Ciao, Katie...Good Luck @ Stanford!

One of the driving forces behind Thrive's product development is the incomparable Katie Taylor. 

She's rustled and wrangled everything from interns to weekly research meetings @ Stanford, all with an intense passion for translating research into practical solutions. 

As you can see, she's also an excellent eater of cake! (picture here with Thrive Specialist, Nicole Jeffery)

Check out her star turn in this video, as she describes how she became involved in Thrive.  (Subscribe to Thrive's YouTube channel for the latest updates.)

We appreciate her many contributions and wish her all the best as she enters a PsyD program at Stanford. 

Study hard, Katie--we can't wait to call you "Doctor"!

TODAY Show Takes on Social Anxiety @ School

Great segment about adolescent and teen anxiety on the Today show!

Dr. Alexandra Barzvi (Assistant Clinical Professor, NYU School of Medicine) and Dana Point (Editor-in-Chief of Parents magazine) joined Kathie Lee and Hoda to talk about how parents can help prepare kids for back to school.

Dr. Barzvi described normal anxiety as transient and not uncommon, given the range of stress-inducing activities like tests, dating, and public speaking. She also described transitions, like the larger classrooms of middle school and high school, as producing more anxiety than usual.

Her advice to parents? “You don't want to pry too much; you do want to listen, you want to be very receptive to what your child is telling you.”

She also encourages parents to watch for any change in their sleep, appetite, and mood.

These are exactly the issues that Thrive Research’s programs address. We offer parents ways to support their kids in building skills to deal with stress, social anxiety, and other issues such as bullying.

Our programs also give parents and teens a forum to discuss behaviors around sleep, nutrition, and fitness.

Find out how Thrive can make sure your child is totally prepared for back to school!

Eat, Play, Live: Life Lessons @ the Movies

Although it’s a very grown-up movie, Eat, Pray, Love offers parents an opportunity to talk to older teens about the power of thoughts and how techniques like self-reflection can open up reservoirs of inner strength.

The main character Liz (played by Julia Roberts) goes on a one year, three country quest to recover from a painful divorce.

During a particularly low moment, she sees herself in a mirrored elevator door and says, "Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend."

According to the true story, part of Liz’s identity issues began when “I always had a boyfriend from the age of 15 on. I would totally lose myself…never spent even a day alone to think about what I wanted.”

She learns from an extended stay at an ashram that with flexible thinking and mindfulness comes the ability to identify alternatives and ultimately forgive herself.

On her other travels, she discovers the communication skills that ultimately lead to trust. And that having a relationship with the occasional pizza isn’t a bad thing.

Give your child joy, without the drama. Thrive Research's programs teach essential techniques like mindfulness and self-reflection that can positively impact the rest of their lives.

photo courtesy of Sony Pictures

Let's Get Moving: First Lady Takes On Fitness

There's nothing more important than your child's health.

In conjunction with Stanford University's Behavioral  Sciences Department, Thrive Research has developed a set of programs to improve the well-being of teens, both physically and emotionally.

We're not alone in our passion. The White House has made children's health a top priority, as evidenced by a recent announcement from the First Lady.

"We want to eliminate this problem of childhood obesity in a generation," Michelle Obama told Good Morning America. "We want our kids to face a different and more optimistic future in terms of their lifespan."

With that in mind, Michelle Obama started "Let's Move," an ambitious, nationwide campaign that calls for "a comprehensive approach that will engage every sector impacting the health of children and will provide schools, families, and communities simple tools to help kids be more active, eat better, and get healthy."

"We all know the numbers," Obama said. "I mean, one in three kids are overweight or obese, and we're spending $150 billion a year treating obesity-related illnesses. So we know this is a problem, and there's a lot at stake."

Developing and maintaining good health habits is a lifelong skill that's best developed at an early age. We applaud the White House for taking the lead and for Michelle's own example of values-in-action by doing cardio with Barack for 30 minutes every day. 

Learn more about Let's Move, the global obesity epidemic, and how Thrive Research can motivate your child to live a healthier, happier life.



   

Emotional Resilience: Trait or Training?

The question of whether emotional resilience is innate or a set of behaviors that can be taught has been widely debated in the psychological community.

Fifth-grader Bryce Marcus (pictured) suggests that it can be both. He and his classmates at New York City's KIPP Infinity Charter School squeeze in “Emotional Health 101” after math class.

One of the subjects is resilience training--flexible thinking skills for managing negative self-talk. Bryce’s response to a cartoon showing an angry coach yelling at a player after a loss? “The coach can be mad ... I'll do better next time."

Instead of taking it personally or being angry with himself, Bryce’s “player” demonstrates the effects of resilience training in managing disappointments and replacing negative thoughts with realistic ones focused on the future.

So next time you find yourself doing a Chicken Little…think again. Chances are that falling sky is just an extra low marine layer and the sun will be back tomorrow.

Listen to the complete story on NPR.

photo courtesy of Allison Aubrey/NPR

Roommate Survival Strategies: Stanford Interns Speak

A good roommate can turn into a BFF and future maid-of-honor. A bad one can make freshman year more dramatic than the Bristol/Levi saga and more horrifying than Heidi Montag’s cosmetic surgery.

Our intrepid Thrive Research interns (pictured here) were kind enough to share their take on the roommate experience. All are students at Stanford, where having a roommate is required for freshman year.

Students are encouraged to sign a roommate contract that can include everything from who buys food to lights out to rules for visitors. All had horror stories of roommates “borrowing” dresses, credit cards, and the thin walls that amplify noises after midnight. These were all things that with good communication and more than a little patience, could be handled.

The problem, according to our foursome, is that incoming students (even the best and brightest) don’t always have a great deal of self-knowledge about themselves with regard to what’s important. Most people, regardless of their age, haven’t developed negotiating skills that stress the importance of ongoing dialogue in getting (and maintaining) a win-win for everyone.

One intern, who spent four years at boarding school and was more than familiar with the drill, put it best, “Some people just didn’t know how to cope. When things got stressful or needed to be discussed, they just shut down.”

Another intern described an experience where one roommate broke the contract early in the year, by having a friend stay over. The two didn’t speak for the rest of the year.

Managing difficult emotions isn’t a skill that’s covered in SAT prep or AP classes, yet it’s essential for college success…especially freshman year. Fortunately, Thrive Research (in conjunction with Stanford University’s Behavioral Sciences Department) has developed a program to teach students these core skills. College Success can be taken as a standalone online program or as one of ten programs in the PeakPerformance College suite.

Get more details here and set your student up for success today!

Thanks to our entire team of interns for their hard work, smarts, and great humor...we've enjoyed your smiling faces and wish you all the best!!